Smile

posted in: Poems 2014 | 0

I have begun to feel connected

To the soil

To the land

To the fruits of the land

I feel the soil struck in my fingernails

And I smile

It has helped me to feel less anxious

Helped me to focus

Helped me to concentrate

Helped me to breathe easy

Breathe with ease

Provided me with a focus

Concentrate with what is around me

I smile

When I see the fruits of my labour grow

I smile

When I pick the fruits of my labour

Knowing how hard the journey has been

From small seeds

From small steps

To where I am today

It is a place ………

posted in: Poems 2014 | 0

It is a place

I know I belong

It is a place

I feel safe

It is a place

That accepts me as I am

It is a place

That loves me unconditionally

It is a place

Where I am left alone with thoughts

It is a place

That keeps me safe

It is a place

Where I am known

It is a place

That allows me to take responsibility for myself

It is a place

Where I see me as me

It is a place

That allows me to leave my worries at the door

It is a place

I know as home

 

The Old me

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The old me

The medication may work wonders for my brain
It plays my life out in slow motion
It provides me a structure
It provides me a framework
Of what I can
Of what I cannot do
I have little control around my appetite
My weight has increased
My thoughts are stable
My life is gradually getting together
I accept who I am
I accept who I was
I just want the old me back

 

Connected

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I resisted until I could resist no more

Instead of being afraid

I was told to embrace

The power of the computer

Informed it could reduce my isolation

Boost my self esteem and confidence

Boost my brain cells

Enhance my self identity

Trained to connect

Trained to understand

Trained to seek out new friends

I reconnected with people of the past

I reconnected with people from around the world

I travelled the world

Just sitting with the computer

I talk, I type, I take photos

I offer advise

I feel worthy to move forward

Embrace with what I am connected with

A Weight off my heart

posted in: Poems 2014 | 0

A poem about learning to live from the heart and listening to our intuition more

Developing well being through the Heart.

A weight off my heart
The heart Carries our Pain
A lifetime struggling to remain Sane
Yet the Sanity we seek is Hidden in our
Ability to be unique

What’s so wrong with being you
Yes it’s only achieved by the very few
A heart longing to be you
Still tortured by wearing a mask masquerading as you

The heart doesn’t need approval
But we are always seeking Praise
Lost within a maze
Till the end of our days
The heart needs love, but more than that
It needs to give love

Weighed down with the wisdom
That enough is enough
The heart has no enemies
It can never feel alone
As within it’s chambers

It’s already known
What we reep we have already sown

The heart has no concept of fear
It’s forever bathed in love
Serene, at ease
And as peaceful as a dove

The heart has no image of time
Although our eyes, tick tock, tick tock
Always
On the clock

The heart cannot hold a grudge
But , oh how we struggle with forgiveness
As the hate adds to the weight
Of the heart

It is said the colour of the heart is Red
But I think it’s Blue
Lost in the confusion , weighed down with the task
Of you being you

Some say the heart is Green
Tortured by the Envy
Of an unanswered
Dream

Others say it is White
Innocent, pure
Connected to the Soul
At our innermost Core

Skeptics say the heart doesn’t even Exist
But my belief cemented
The first time we
Kissed

The truth is the heart is Pink
Reflecting
Unconditional love
The missing Link

They say if the heart could Speak, it would speak as a prophet
And would be as wise as an Owl
Courage of a Lion
And love as it’s Growl

The heart has a memory
It’s as bright as a Star
The heart holds our loved ones
When they’re near or they’re far

The heart holds a Secret?
And it’s known by only a few
And it’s this…..
When you live from the heart <3
That’s when you are being the real you!

By Gary Molloy

Prison Sell

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This is about my journey through Bipolar illness and going from Caterpiller to butterfly

from ill health to well-being

Prison Sell

I feel better when I am living mindfully and living my life from a place of love as opposed to a place of fear

As I delve to see within your soul

The image of a butterflies wings unfold

A lifetime struggling just to get by

But now it’s time to learn to fly

As you flutterby there’s a gentle knowing

Wherever you go, loves always flowing

And as you release the confines of your outermost shell

Look to where you Stumbled not where you fell

As you Emerge , you may lose Vision and your spirit lack Insight

At times Crippled by Emotion at times tortured by fright

That’s Why your Self Imposed Prison Mimmicks my Hell

Look to where you Stumbled not where you Fell

I am Hankering for altitude, Yet my aptitude is low

Now my attitude Screams at me

‘As above, So below’

As a silent voice whispers “am I starting to Grow”

Freedom is an attribute of a peaceful, open Mind

And as a parachute only functions when open

So does the

Mind

That Shadow within your deepest self

Now nurtured, tamed and gaining health

Do you have a Soul to Sell

Look to where you stumbled, not where you fell

That Prison Sell it’s all in your Mind

There are no Locks, Walls or Guards you’ll Find

As I look out of these Illunsionary bars

Some nights I see the dirt , and some nights the stars

Now it’s time to abandon your self imposed State

Focus only on what you Love and let go of what you hate

And as you break free from this Fragile Hell

Remember , look to where you stumbled not where you fell

By Gary Molloy

It’s lovely

posted in: Poems 2014 | 0

 

We all live on a beautiful tropical island
a place where the homeless are given homes
where there is an abundance of food to eat
where there are hospitals full of doctors and nurses that want to make us well
where there are police to keep us safe
where there are charities doing everything they can
where there is recycling
where there are staff in shops who offer you an extra bag, without you asking, and then they put your stuff in the bag for you, and it wasn’t even anything you bought in their shop
where there are people that say hello
where there are people on canals that wave
where bikes ring bells to let you know they are there
where cars stop to let you go
where were allowed outside
where there are parks and flowers and squirrels and trees
where there are buses and trains
where there are people like Neil from finding mike
where there are festivals
where there is cutlery and crockery going spare
where there are people lots of different people who are all the same, brilliant, but none of them same
where there are vans that sell ice cream
where your not obliged to talk
where you can talk as much as you like
where you have a right to work
where there are bins to put your rubbish
where things can be delivered to your door
where you can be yourself
where we are free
where there’s no such thing as normal
where there’s no such thing as sane
where there’s always something or someone that makes you think life is really great
where there’s a healthy obsession with tea
where there’s muggles and wizards
where it sort of all works really in a funny kind of way
and then when it doesn’t something will happen
or someone will come along to make it better
just because they can or because they had an idea
it is lovely.  Our beautiful tropical island.
Even when it rains.

Library

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Library
 
I find myself huddled
In the reference section of the library
Where silence reigns supreme
Where books rule the landscape
In neatly orderly rows
Organisation collection of information
Residing on shelves
On subjects beyond my understanding
On subjects beyond my vocabulary
I arrive here early
Position myself and my belongings on the table
Select a book from the shelf
Open it
Begin to read
Until I understand the meaning
Until I can feel the pain, the passion
Until I can visualise the landscape of the written word
I stop only to sneak in a sandwich
Rules forbid this
But I have mastered the craft
Then I start reading again
Until 5pm today
When the library closes.
I shall be here again tomorrow

Note to self

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Note to self

 
Exercise
To release the happy chemicals
Called endorphins
They talk to the receptors in my brain
Triggering off an overall positive feeling
By regular exercising
I can reduce stress
Ward off anxiety
Fight off feelings of depression
Boost self esteem and confidence
Additional benefits include:
Strengthening of the heart
increased energy levels
Lowing of the blood pressure
Improving muscle tone and strength
Strengthening and building bones
Reducing body fat
A ‘win-win’ situation

Play time

posted in: Poems 2014 | 0
Play time 
 
Non directive’
‘Non intrusive’
They call it
I simply call it playtime
Surrounded by toys
In all shapes and sizes
Some that make noise
Some that do not make noise
Some that make musical notes
Some that omit bright lights
By playing
I have entered the world of the child
Almost encouraging the child
To work towards finding their own solution
To work through the chaos
To make sense of the chaos
Until peace is restored

Passion

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Passion

 
When he touches the keys
The great velocity of a pressed key
Produces
The greater force of the hammer
Hitting the string
The louder the sound of the note produced
I know when he plays the piano
He is well
He plays with passion
He plays with love
It effects his emotions
Influences his character
Calms his soul
He is free
He is at one
With the piano
I also know when he is unwell
That is when he does not play.

Talk to the photo

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The loss was immense

The pain unbearable

Instead

Sitting in my room

Door closed

Photo next to bed

I sit and talk

To the photo of the person

Who knows me

Who knew me

The photo cannot provide a response

But it eases my pain

It soothes the hurt

Until the next time I need to talk

The Volunteer

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The volunteer

Provided me with confidence

The volunteer entered my life

Provided a structure

Provided routines

Requested I kept a diary of my fleeting thoughts

Requested that I kept a “To do” list

Provided me with hope

 

Listens to me

Calms me

Reassures me

He sits with my problems

Tries to resolve them

Rather than allows me fester over them

He brings a smile to my face

That’s all I need

Scribe

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My notebook is a companion

A true companion

Each page is a fresh start

Each page is blank

Waiting to be written on

Waiting to be scribbled on

Waiting to be doodled on

It is how I cope

With the contents of my head

With the voices in my head

With life events

I write them all

As I experience them